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Noah walks ahead of me now.

Noah in Savannah.  Walking way ahead of me.
Noah walks in front of me now.  When I try to get him to slow down, it is so hard for him.  He just has things on his mind that he wants to do, and he wants to get on with it (exhibit A: he both pulled out in front of a car on his bike, and walked into a  glass door at the beach last week.  Seriously, he's in a hurry). 

He has just reached that time in his life when he needs to find his own way, and this is where I see it most clearly.  It is a hard part of parenting for sure, but our walking paces are going to intersect no matter what, because I am never going to stop looking for opportunities when we can grow together.

I realized much of this yesterday, when I taught him how to shave with an electric razor, and it made me cry.  I just want to be close to him, and yet he needs to walk ahead of me.  I get it.  I have felt the way he feels.  But I am going to be with him as much as I can, and he is going to know how much I love him.  So, I need to find what he loves, and meet him there. 

Music is easy.  We both love music so much, and he has started introducing me to new bands, and I love it so much.  He is even going to see Chvrches with us in a few months.

We also both love movies.  So recently we have started a new tradition.  We made a list of  PG-13 "classic" movies from 1975 through 2005 (the year that he was born), and we are watching all of them together throughout this summer. Just the two of us.  It slows him down, and gives us something to do together.  And it has been amazing.  We are only two movies in (Jaws, and Pretty in Pink), but we spend our evenings together, talking about these old movies, and laughing about how dated they seem to him. 

So he will keep walking in front of me, and I am cool with it.  Because I will always be there, right behind him.

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